So I know that my theme for this site is trying to be a self-deprecating story of:
“Here’s how I worry that I might suck, and what I’m doing to hopefully suck less in the future”.
… and yes, it’s true, I am very much Imperfect Todd
But even as much as I truly believe that I could be doing better at a lot of things, the reality is, relatively speaking (perspective) my life is pretty darn good.
And more importantly …
I fully expect (optimism) that it’s going to keep getting better.
I think perspective and optimism kind of go hand in hand, at least in the respect that it’s a little easier to be optimistic about the future if you possess the ability to put your past and present in perspective.
We humans tend to have a natural bias towards negativity (and sometimes it’s even warranted) but in every situation (especially the “bad” ones) there is a magic rhetorical question we can ask ourselves that helps put thing in perspective:
What’s good about this?
Seriously.
Sometimes it’s really hard, and it may take quite a while to come up with an acceptable answer, but ultimately there’s always going to be something we can grasp on to.
There’s also a kind of companion question that helps even more when it comes to perspective:
How would I feel about this if I were a different person, with different circumstances?
I’ll give you kind of a silly example …
I recently got a raise at work (yes, us federal employees get those every year or two) and after doing the math, I caught myself lamenting that the $200 or so a month (the actual amount of the raise) wouldn’t make a material difference in my lifestyle.
Then I caught myself …
Wait, what the fuck Todd?
If I were working for minimum wage at Walmart or a fast food place, I would be over the moon about earning $200 more a month.
Damn …
Shut up and be thankful already!
… and that’s perspective in a nutshell.
No matter where we currently sit on the totem pole of life, we all almost certainly have some things to be grateful for.
Which bring me to Optimism …
I’ve actually been scolded that “you’re not really an optimist” because I sometimes get depressed, angry, or un-appreciative about the curveballs that life often throws our way. This totally misunderstands what that word means.
Optimism is not the (irrational) belief that things are “always good”.
Instead, it’s the faith that even when we find ourselves in stormy waters, we will eventually enjoy basking in the sunlight again, because given a long-enough timeline life pretty much always evens out.
At certain points in my life I may have take this slightly to the extreme. This was my literal self talk:
Man, this totally sucks! But hey, if things are this bad, it must mean I’ve got some really good stuff coming my way somewhere down the line. 🙃
… and that’s always proven to be true!
The good stuff does come.
Which brings me right back to the theme of this New Greater YOU site.
It’s okay to suck.
Just because we’re imperfect now, doesn’t mean that there’s not a better version of ourselves parked somewhere down around the corner of time, just waiting to be discovered and occupied.
Til next time,
Todd