I ended up doing a lot of work setting up and breaking down the reception venue for Kelly’s son Seth’s wedding. The wedding itself was on Sunday afternoon, so Saturday was “setup day” …
We arrived at the Logan IA community center at 9:15 am.
Aunt Ellen who owns the local motel was nominally running the show, but we quickly discovered that the plan was pretty flexible. None-the-less, one of the groomsmen, Jaden and I eagerly jumped in to do whatever we were told.
Despite mild warnings I’d been given, Ellen was easy to work with. She had her ideas, but was also open to suggestions, and even implemented a few of mine.
Then at about 11am Kelly and Aunt Becky took a break from cake decorating to come provide additional help with the venue setup.
For me at least, the atmosphere quickly became noticeably more tense.
I like to think that my time in the military provided me with the attributes of both a good leader and a good follower. But for some reason, when it came to the second task, I found it much easier to take “orders” from Aunt Ellen than even “suggestions” from Kelly.
Why is that?
What is it that makes it easier (for some of us anyway) to interact, work, and comprise with people we’ve just met, than with someone we’ve been in a relationship with for years?
In the end, I apparently held things together pretty well …
However, I’m left searching for strategies I can use to repeat this behavior when we’re back home with only ourselves (and maybe the teens) around.
We’ve all heard the advice to “dance like no one’s watching”.
I think I need modify that a little bit for my interactions with Kelly to:
Talk and respond like the room is full of people you just met.
I’ll let you know how it goes.
Til next time,
Todd