While I can't say I'm a cat, dog or any animal person for that matter, I very much enjoyed this, piece, Todd! And I knew we shared more in common and then I saw your love for Diet Dew and that was that.
I’ve been saying for like 20+ years that I was going to quit Diet Dew.
But why would I?
Back when I was still active duty, I jokingly referred to myself as a “dewaholic” since I would sometimes get to the house and pour myself a glass of Diet Dew over ice cubes then just sit in my chair and quietly sip it.
Realistically, if this is my worst vice (and I’m pretty confident it is), I’m probably not doing too bad overall.
I have had more cat and dog pets in my 65 years than I care to try to list. I'm also quite the realist (some might say 'cynical'). Some years ago, at a works function, I once found myself talking with a lady who started talking about crystal therapy and reiki and asked me if I'd ever had my chakras realigned. Quick as a flash (for me, at least) I told her that my car had recently had new tyres fitted and I'd had my wheels balanced - and did that count?
I might be wrong (it's been known to happen) but I really don't subscribe to any of the new-age therapy / treatments. If rubbing certain lotions and potions into various parts of one's anatomy provides a genuinely beneficial effect, it's chemical / biological and measurable - not mysticism.
If I have a 'Spirit Animal' it's something lumpy, hairy and slow-moving. Most times, I identify as a four-slice toaster.
lol, I love your answer to have you had your chakras aligned. I'd like to say I would have a similar response, but maybe not quite as quick on the draw as you were. Good job!
Some things you live to regret. My response was taken as challenge to try to convince me that chakra alignment is a real thing. It was at that precise moment that I realised the full beneficial effect of the "selective deafness" mode that my wife insists I have.
Ok see, here'd where I expose myself even further lol, my brain refuses to cooperate because I don't think I'm one spirit animal.
Genuinely, most days I'm absolutely a house cat. 1000 % without a doubt about it, sunbeams, silence, snacks and an attentive staff of 1 brining me said snacks like, with the energy of please don't perceive me. 😂
But, if and when someone enters the room and starts talking about something that genuinely lights up my curiosity, I become an overexcited puppy who has just discovered its favourite human and forgotten every cool, mysterious thing it was trying to be five minutes earlier 😑
So apparently, my spirit animal has a split personality dependent entirely on the quality of its people. 🤷🏼♀️😂 Makes senses LoL
This does absolutely make sense. Heck, I'm sure our cats and dogs are also different "spirits" depending on who they're around.
I probably need a bit more excited puppy time myself.
I'm not going to try to assign an animal to anyone else in my life, but I am thankful that I seem to be the only "cat" in the house ... seeing as how one of the real cat still hasn't seemed to forgiven me for putting her in the back of an SUV to drive across the country to a new house, THEEE YEARS AGO.
If I was held to that standard with humans I'd be spending a lot of time in the doghouse. 🙃
I’m cautious to say this because I don’t want it to be taken the wrong way, but I’m lucky my loved ones tend to lean more towards puppies … in that I can be a real jerk sometimes, and they’re usually still wanting my attention just an hour or two later.
Not at all a good look for me.
But as I said, better all around than if they were cats … that said, I know not to be a jerk to my cats.
I might call myself a Rhode Island Red. My Dad was very funny when he wanted to be. I would just cackle, and he'd say, "Keep it up, Pam. Lay another dozen for us."
I'm happy to sit on my roost and eat as much as I want. Nobody asks me to do much more than that.
From my internationally well received substack series The Wonton Monologues. I must respect the choices and druthers, or so you say, of this fellow cat. It is not necessarily a feline-specific lifestyle, but is valid for this fellow.
I, Wonton, have a very different outlook on my life here with Schminkie for whom I have great respect. He is a fine steward of my life here with him He sees to my wellbeing and I his. We validate the thoughts and feelings of one another. Most of all we are great companions. You do not have to ask him. You need only read our chronicles, The Wonton Monologues. Ps. Anybody calling me Wonton the House Cat will suffer. Yes, suffer.
While I can't say I'm a cat, dog or any animal person for that matter, I very much enjoyed this, piece, Todd! And I knew we shared more in common and then I saw your love for Diet Dew and that was that.
Cheers!
I’ve been saying for like 20+ years that I was going to quit Diet Dew.
But why would I?
Back when I was still active duty, I jokingly referred to myself as a “dewaholic” since I would sometimes get to the house and pour myself a glass of Diet Dew over ice cubes then just sit in my chair and quietly sip it.
Realistically, if this is my worst vice (and I’m pretty confident it is), I’m probably not doing too bad overall.
I've been through every diet soda on the market and Diet Dew is the best.
It's a perfectly fine vice...or at least I tell myself that every lent when I give it up for 40 days.
lol, so what I’m hearing is that you have a 40 day headache every lent.
Yes, but I medicate with chocolate
My spirit animal is coffee
Lol, dark and bitter?
Or you put a pep in people’s step and a smile on their face first thing in the morning?
It’s more of a comfort animal
I have had more cat and dog pets in my 65 years than I care to try to list. I'm also quite the realist (some might say 'cynical'). Some years ago, at a works function, I once found myself talking with a lady who started talking about crystal therapy and reiki and asked me if I'd ever had my chakras realigned. Quick as a flash (for me, at least) I told her that my car had recently had new tyres fitted and I'd had my wheels balanced - and did that count?
I might be wrong (it's been known to happen) but I really don't subscribe to any of the new-age therapy / treatments. If rubbing certain lotions and potions into various parts of one's anatomy provides a genuinely beneficial effect, it's chemical / biological and measurable - not mysticism.
If I have a 'Spirit Animal' it's something lumpy, hairy and slow-moving. Most times, I identify as a four-slice toaster.
lol, I love your answer to have you had your chakras aligned. I'd like to say I would have a similar response, but maybe not quite as quick on the draw as you were. Good job!
Some things you live to regret. My response was taken as challenge to try to convince me that chakra alignment is a real thing. It was at that precise moment that I realised the full beneficial effect of the "selective deafness" mode that my wife insists I have.
lol, yeah, that stuff is never real when you need it to be. 😁
Ok see, here'd where I expose myself even further lol, my brain refuses to cooperate because I don't think I'm one spirit animal.
Genuinely, most days I'm absolutely a house cat. 1000 % without a doubt about it, sunbeams, silence, snacks and an attentive staff of 1 brining me said snacks like, with the energy of please don't perceive me. 😂
But, if and when someone enters the room and starts talking about something that genuinely lights up my curiosity, I become an overexcited puppy who has just discovered its favourite human and forgotten every cool, mysterious thing it was trying to be five minutes earlier 😑
So apparently, my spirit animal has a split personality dependent entirely on the quality of its people. 🤷🏼♀️😂 Makes senses LoL
This does absolutely make sense. Heck, I'm sure our cats and dogs are also different "spirits" depending on who they're around.
I probably need a bit more excited puppy time myself.
I'm not going to try to assign an animal to anyone else in my life, but I am thankful that I seem to be the only "cat" in the house ... seeing as how one of the real cat still hasn't seemed to forgiven me for putting her in the back of an SUV to drive across the country to a new house, THEEE YEARS AGO.
If I was held to that standard with humans I'd be spending a lot of time in the doghouse. 🙃
😂😂😂 literary snort laughed, because the three year resentment piece tracks😂. You sure it’s not a Taurus? Otherwise you are literally living with me 😂😂
I’m cautious to say this because I don’t want it to be taken the wrong way, but I’m lucky my loved ones tend to lean more towards puppies … in that I can be a real jerk sometimes, and they’re usually still wanting my attention just an hour or two later.
Not at all a good look for me.
But as I said, better all around than if they were cats … that said, I know not to be a jerk to my cats.
Probably a lesson in there somewhere.
Cats are said to perfectly understand up to 300 different commands and instructions.
They ignore them all.
I might call myself a Rhode Island Red. My Dad was very funny when he wanted to be. I would just cackle, and he'd say, "Keep it up, Pam. Lay another dozen for us."
I'm happy to sit on my roost and eat as much as I want. Nobody asks me to do much more than that.
Doesn't sound like a bad life at all.
From my internationally well received substack series The Wonton Monologues. I must respect the choices and druthers, or so you say, of this fellow cat. It is not necessarily a feline-specific lifestyle, but is valid for this fellow.
I, Wonton, have a very different outlook on my life here with Schminkie for whom I have great respect. He is a fine steward of my life here with him He sees to my wellbeing and I his. We validate the thoughts and feelings of one another. Most of all we are great companions. You do not have to ask him. You need only read our chronicles, The Wonton Monologues. Ps. Anybody calling me Wonton the House Cat will suffer. Yes, suffer.
I’m definitely not a house cat, they’re far too sociable.
I am Wonton. Of course you remember me from my
lol, I’m looking forward to your jackass post … well maybe not all of it.